So, what are you doing Thursday night?

'Cause there's this, this party, and I thought that maybe, if you weren't doing anything, you might want to come with me?

Yeah, I'm never gonna get a date.

So, those of you who know me know where my kids go to school. Or could find out easily via email. The school is throwing our annual Halloween Carnival. It's actually really flipping fun. We turn the whole auditorium into a big ass hanted house, and to do this we as the PTA offer a 6 week class on haunted house building during school hours on Fridays just to get it done. Ahhh, child labor cleverly disguised as public education. So, there's a haunted house, a costume parade, something called a cake walk?, loads of *really healthy, low fat, high protein snacks, games, glow-in-the-dark trinckets for sale, face painting, you name it. It's super fun and the kiddies love it, and your kiddie would love it, too. You should bring him/her/them.

You seriously should come. You. Specifically YOU. I'll cry a little if you don't and seeings how I'm all emotionally fragile and shit right now, you should be doing everything in your power to prevent that.

I'm just sayin'.

*You just keep right on telling yourself that those Halloween cupcakes are good for you. Go ahead, have another one.