kids with hangovers

The day after Halloween has got to be the shittiest day to be a teacher. On the playground this morning were a bunch of boogie-nosed, red-eyed, candy-hungover children.

My kids and I had a flipping blast last night. My friend Mary throws a huge birthday party for her husband, whose birthday is on Halloween, complete with a pot of the world's greatest jambalaya, lots of beer, and throngs of children who all trick-or-treat together.

B went off the with big kids and I didn't see him for and hour and a half.

T went out with the little kids and I also didn't see him but in passing for well over and hour.


It took L all of two doors to figure this whole candy-getting thing out. Her strategy: walk up to screen door and bang. Allow homeowner to open door and shriek at said homeowner.


Snatch candy from hand of homeowner, shriek again and in a much higher decibel than before, turn tail and run, giggling.


Next door, repeat.

She, of course, being the cutest baby the world has even known, got an assload of candy.

We returned to the party, B literally crawled INTO his pillowcase and began the crucial sorting process, T played an hand of cards with someone's dad and L began the quick decent into the valley of the overstimulated-candy-rushing-through-the-veins-baby land. She was interesting, to say the least.

While we were all busy cheering B on as he bobbed for apples...


T snuck out with a group of older kids and went trick-or-treating again, for something like another hour. I'm not really sure how long he was gone; I had no idea he had left. File this under bad mom #6,392. B and I took L home to put her to bed and someone called from the party when T resurfaced. B and I picked T up and we headed off at 8:30 ish to a little concert.

Some kids I used to know have this band. They are...what do they call it again? High voltage nerd rock? Something like that. It's like if Weezer met They Might Be Giants and they all dropped acid. But in a good way. The boys and I shuffled on over to their show and stayed maybe 40 minutes. T was asleep within 5 minutes of being back in the car. B was asleep before we got home.

They both climbed into bed the air mattress with me and that's that. Asleep by 11:30. It was fabulously fun and surprisingly exhausting and I guess that, this year, I was "old" for Halloween. So much for that MILF disguise I was going for.