i am an evil mother

Q: What feels worse than a week+ of the flu?

A: Giving it to your poor, defenseless 4 month old baby.

Yep, the kiddo has the flu. And, guess what? At 4 months, there is nothing at all we can do about it. No Tamiflu, no nothing. Just infants Tylenol and patience. She is absolutely pathetic. Her eyes are puffy and red, she has this gut-wrentching little cough, she only wants to sleep in my arms, she's burning up with fever, she has so many boogies in her nose that it's making her puke, she is beyond exhausted, and nobody is eating her feet because she's too bundled up. I bet she could get through the rest ok, but the kid needs her feet eaten at least once a day or life as she knows it will cease to be.

We do have to give her nebulizer treatments every 4 hours, and let me tell you how much she loves that. So much. It's her favorite.

Not really.

In fact, it makes her scream bloody fucking murder at the very tip-top of her lung capacity, which is great for getting the medicine deep into her lungs, but terrible for a) my achy-breaky heart that cannot handle hearing her whimper, let alone scream; b) my ears, who are still recovering from my own flu-spell and are really quite sensitive still; and c) my boobies, whose milk supply is all screwed up from little miss too sick to eat and tend to leak like Karl Rove with the name of a CIA agent every time she so much as chirps.

So, here I sit, waiting for the two boys to get it, and then the real fun begins. Keep your fingers crossed for me.