Just a quick intro to me and a message to the Mister Mister herself. I am the unfortunate side effect and an experiment gone wrong. The experiment was to find out what happens when two people that should be sterilized decide to have children. Oh well. After the failed attempt they decided that I needed a playmate... (Have they not heard of a puppy?) So there you have Mr. Lady. (Really, that's the why of Mr. Lady)
I currently am father to three fantastic kids and husband to one fabulous wife. I am a computer geek who loves music and my BMX bike. I like the Sci-Fi and romantic Comedies. I love to cook, golf, and play video games.
So over the years Mr. Lady has given you many anecdotes about some of the horrific goings on in our household. These are comical and scary all at the same time, the beauty that was our hate hate relationship, but I thought as a holiday message I would give you a quick perspective switch. As I said, Mr. Lady was born as my personal plaything, which looking back, didn't quite turn out the way they had hoped. What does she mean to me...
This is the person that in order to save me from a beating (and when I say beating I mean picture a 5 year old child being spanked with a white leather belt with metal studs and because... I don't know, he didn't cry enough or violently withdraw into a cocoon of fear and agony, the man who fathered him decides to switch to a wire hanger to make sure he feels good about himself while seeing how much blood he can draw without being questioned by the authorities, not that they cared that much back then) she took the blame for drinking the cherry juice out of the jar thus taking the beating. The stories like to say I "Jedi Mind Tricked" her, but as all of you know she is too smart for that.
I had begged to get a Cabbage Patch doll, Chuck was his name, just so that I might have something to play with her. And we did play, for hours at a time. I use to build these "club houses" out of sheets in our rooms to play in. We would also talk for hours through a little hole in the wall, one meant for a telephone socket. My entire life I wanted to be just like her. Cute, smart, witty... So you may find yourself asking what all about the horror stories you have heard. Well they are all true, mostly. :-) I think of them this way though; You ever have that boy or girl you really liked, but in the state of emotional madness that only childhood can deliver instead of being nice and approaching that person, well like an adult you did the exact opposite? Like telling them they have cooties? Or harassing them to the point of exhaustion? This is a lot like that. While there is a lot more I could say about it, I know I was ass like as a kid but three years ago I had thanksgiving with my younger sister and her FANTASTIC family. It was a small place. I had my entire family which at the time was only four people, and she had her family of five and we stayed for like 4 days. Most people would have been done by day two, and three years later I wish I was still there. It was the best holiday, or weekend I have ever had.
Now I am guest blogging on her online diary. There are no words to describe how much I love her and her our family, but being a music guy, I think Little Wonders is really a good way to finish up this thought.
Nough said. (Due to an influx of confused and head spun readers, like the exorcist, but different... well not all that different. Here is the section break and the start of the actual blog subject.)
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What to write about? Kids? Games? Twizzlers? Music? I like all these things, I know let's write about ALL of this!
In a crazy world where all video games must have someone shooting someone else, half nekked <fill in the blank>, G's, pimp's and ho ho ho's the Boys and Girls at Media Molecule have introduced an AMAZING new game... (Yes I love ellipses, I use them generously and with total disregard for the English language.)
So you start with a sack, like a rice sack ( you know the ones with the ridiculously hard to cook rice... something about soaking it, and then pre-cooking it, then cooking it. Uncle Ben is my freaking HERO) Now you fill it with beans ( you know those beans, not kidney or pinto, but the ones you again need a six year degree to even purchase) and you have this guy.
This guy is cute. Then you get to customize him...
So you think, this is cool... This is pretty neat, now what? So you start to explore and with the help of an insanly soothing and clear to understand voice (like the voice of god, but like I said, easy to understand) you discover a world of corrigated cardboard and sponges. Once you get into this new world you find a place of creativity and fun, (The artwork reminds me of a well done Monte Python art with a bit of Tim Burton thrown in for flavor) where you and your Sack friends can go and play and explore.
In your exploration you find and collect patchs, stickers, cute objects like tiki masks and a plethora of materials to customize your world and your sack. All of this is done without ever picking up a gun or large heaving breast popping up at awkward times. And when I say cutomize your world I mean this image below is all from scratch!!! Ok so this looks to be pretty complicated then, I mean how can it look like this without some Astro-Phsyics degree from MIT? Well if that were true the 7 and 5 year old playing in my house must be pretty advanced. (While I assume they were born with the knowledge of the entire world and are infact the smartest kids on the planet, one must face the reality I am might be biased) And yes it's super cute, every time my 2of3 has to restart an area he re-creates his sack. Him and 1of3 will sit around and see what super hero's then can make. They found a red cape on a level and now they have superman, unless of course they put glasses on him then he is clark kent. Or if they get that... it looks like a Tim Burton skeleton suit, and puts a cape on it, it's dead Superman... "but not rewee, it's juss a game Dad." But they sit there and giggle and laugh as they put outfits on and off endlessly.
OH and you can control the emotions they show... like angry for instance:
And the music that is used in game has me tapping my feet and my 3of3 spinning and dancing. You can also find music clips in levels to add to your levels which is also super neat and customizable.
So with that, here is level creation demo video and a gameplay video, I hope you enjoy.
See, it's that bad that I'm quoting Belinda Carlyse. *shudder*
I'll return on the 1st either refreshed and renewed and ready to hit it hard or twitching, drooling and dragging one leg behind me. Either way, blog fodder. Far be it from me to leave you all hanging with no holiday cheer, however. I've lined up a star studded cast of guest posters, none of which have ever been in my uterus. There's a first time for everything, dawg. So, me and mine bid you and yours a fond fairwell, and wish you love and laughter and chocolate. Especially the chocolate.
(Go on, push play. It'll hurt, but it's short.)
(Unless, of course, you're reading this in your reader. You'll just have to click through this one time.)
Wishing You a Very Merry Christmas from Mr Lady on Vimeo.
And if you want something more, say, in tune, here's a playlist for you of my mostest favorite holiday songs. It'll be over there in the sidebar until New Year's, too. Hell, the first ten people who say they want the cd version and then email me their address get it. Mr Lady, out.
We're going to have an awesome Christmas. The food will rock, the company will be fine, and the kids will get their hearts' desire. This year, they're getting fewer and more meaningful gifts. I cannot wait. As for The Donor and me, we're spicing it up. Experimenting. As anyone married this long has to do. We're shopping for ourselves.
We came to this agreement because I buy him crap he hates and he buys me the left side of the mall in hopes that one thing will be right. He doesn't want crap, and I would like to pay the heating bill this month, so we're going to try this. We both hate the idea of it, though, so we've made some compromises.
He and I will buy the Santa gift for each other. We will keep that gift a secret. Then, on Sunday night, we will dress up in our fancy clothes, go have a ridiculously over-thought meal at the most pompous restaurant you could ever imagine (we have a gift certificate, shut up) and then we're going shopping. Together. Downtown. At night, with hot chocolates and hand holding and Christmas lights on trees. He's going to help me pick out some shirts and I'll show him which watches I think bring out his grey eyes.
We'll each get what we want, no one will overspend, and we'll get a very very hot date out of the whole thing. That's the best Christmas gift ever if you ask me.
Of course, we're doing that four days before Christmas, and I'll have to start finish the kids up on Sunday morning before we go out. We're totally screwed. And I couldn't care less, because it will be awesome no matter what. If I have to shop for them at Safeway, so be it. The kids like Fruit Roll Ups, and they're easy to wrap.
Who am I kidding? I totally shop for them at Safeway. I'm there every damn day anyway. That one bag in my closet? Safeway bag. You can fill a stocking without so much as thinking while you wait for them to ring up your milk. Provided, of course, your kids are into batteries, pens, chapstick, bubble gum and iTunes. Which mine are. Speaking of which, anyone need one of those iTunes gift cards they sell at the checkout at Safeway? (Or Save-on Foods, Sobeys, Mac's and A&P, to be perfectly fair.) Because I have an extra $25 one. You can totally have it, but you have to live in Canada. Because screw you guys with your US only giveaways. CANADIANS ARE PEOPLE, TOO. There's no way I can get it to you in time for Christmas, but maybe by New Years? Leave your name in the comments and I'll pick one on Saturday, right before I go offline for the rest of the year.